Life Lately

My life tends to be anything but slow paced and "ordinary" and honestly, I would not have it any other way. The summer goes by so slowly but once September rolls around, I hit the ground running. 

My life has revolved around three major things lately. Work. School. Exercise. In that order. Work has been crazy but fun working with the Preschool 3 year olds. 

Then there is college. I am taking 2 classes this semester which means commuting to the school twice a week and doing lots of projects for my classes.

Lastly, my exercise program which is new for me and I am loving it immensely. It is a challenge for me and trying to eat healthy with this program gives me a run for my money. Especially when trying to make new recipes for meals and snacks.

Then the weekends are filled with a number of different activities. Going to Philadelphia, weekends in Camden County, birthday parties, 5k color run, and the list goes on and on.

But my greatest love right now is that life lately is continuously changing. I feel so blessed to be able to do the things I am doing in life and to spend time with friends who I cherish and treasure their friendship. My life is busy but I life it that way and I would not have it any other way.

Dear Nursie

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  Dear Nursie,

  Just recently I was writing down ‘my story’ on how I came to be an obese young adult. I compiled my list of memories over my years in school. While I was writing down my story and finishing up with Pulaski Street, I began to reminisce about my time spent at the Middle School. I was far too young to realize it then but now looking back, I see how much the Middle School had a direct impact on my life during that time and a lingering impact as I have matured through the past few years.

  I experienced a lot of bullying through my 7th and 8th grade years because of my weight and it had such a negative impact on my self-esteem. I never fully understand why the other kids were so mean and chose to treat me in such cruel ways. Of course there were days that I admired all the girls who were thin and healthy but I never made the connection that if I were to be conscious of what I put in my mouth, I could one day become skinny or at least be at a healthy weight. All of the days that I bought lunch and would buy from the snack stand the Snapple, Zebra Cakes and Strawberry Rolls had a direct impact on my weight. When I think back to those foods I tend to want to beat myself up for letting myself eat those things and let myself get so out of control. Yet, I know that I cannot go back and take back the things I ate or did not eat.

  As I reminisce of my Middle School years, you always come back to my mind. I never felt more safe and loved than when I was in your office, it was my safe zone during my 7th and 8th grade year. Stepping through your office door, I felt a sense of comfort and serenity. You nurtured not only me but the “group” of us kids who would come to you needing not physical healing but emotional healing and nurturing. Never did you pressure me to try and lose the weight or be like the other kids in school. I was treated like a Middle School student who had needs that in small ways you helped to fulfill. You accepted me for my personality for who I was on the inside as opposed to what I looked like on the outside.

  In a way you taught me so many life lessons during those years, that I would not realize until I “grew up” and was able to take a stand back and re-examine events in my life. You have this incredibly amazing gift to be able to take care of and care for children who really need it the most. Those hours I spent with in your office are memories that I wish cherish forever. The days we listened to the Bee Gee’s and the hamsters (?) you had on your desk that sang. The way I would feel walking into my ‘safe zone’ leaving all my worries and cares at the door. Just for a little while I could be a kid and not worrying about the impending move from Long Island to New Jersey.

  I will never forget the last time I saw you. It was the 8th grade graduation ceremony at the High School. I was filled with so many emotions; anger, hurt and sadness. It was all due to the day coming so near that I would have to say good-bye to everyone I held close, everyone who I loved. You were one of the chaperones at the dance after the ceremony and the group that once congregated in your office, were all congregating in a circle. Right outside the cafeteria door is where we said our good-byes. A piece of my heart left with you that night and it has always been with you.

  Thank you for all that you have ever done for me. While it may have seemed insignificant at the time, it meant the world to me and it continues to mean a lot to me. The things you did for me touched me in a way that I cannot put into words. Your kindness has furthered my desire of becoming the best teacher that I can be. While you may not have been an official “teacher”, you were a teacher of the best lessons of all; life lessons. Not many teachers/school staff can do that through simple gestures or conversations. I have realized by looking back on my middle school years, I may not have made the best choices especially with my eating habits but I am learning and growing. I know now how I got to be where I was in both weight and my self-esteem. Simple things that I did and sometimes do, like eating when I am stressed has made me become self-aware of when I eat and what emotions I am feeling at that time.

  I am proud to say that I am finally at the weight I was when I walked across the stage at my 8th grade graduation. I have all intentions of continuing in my journey to be a healthy individual for not only myself, but for everyone who has ever had a positive impact on my life and most importantly for my future. I will soon be closing a 10 year door on my weight loss journey and leaving the 200’s behind. It baffles me every time I think of it because I am taking another step closer to being healthy and at a weight where I am no longer classified as ‘obese’. Yet this 10 year road would not be complete without bumps along the way or roads with uncertain futures. Thank you for being there for the early years of my 10 year journey to help set up the foundations that I am using to help improve my own life.

  Much love always,

  

  
  

  
  

  
  

  
  

  *****This post is part of Blogtember, the challenge was to write a letter to someone special in your life.

Diet and Exercise Changes

After 12 days of waiting for my DVD program from my friend Erika, it arrived in the mail on Monday. The program is called Turbo Fire and it is a program that focuses on HIIT workouts and gives a number of different programs and a schedule of which DVD's to do on which day. I started it on Monday with my first day off on Wednesday and I feel great! It is a super easy workout and a lot of it is repetition but once I figured out the counting for the moves, it goes by quickly. There are 1 minute drills throughout each tape which make it interesting and then the rest breaks are great. By the end of a 20 minute workout I am drenched in sweat, and I love the feeling!

The class really brings you in as if you were standing among the rest of the group doing the exercises, Chaelene is a great support and motivates you to push yourself father than you ever expected. I tend to be a person who gets nervous doing exercise videos because of lack of support and possibly being poked fun of by family but I just get into my workout routine and all is forgotten around me.

In addition to adding this program, I have read online that one should also look at nutrition and focus on the ratio of fats/proteins/carbs and try to up the proteins/carbs and lessen the fats in your diet. Before getting ready for this program, I never took advantage of looking at the reports on LoseIt! to see what my eating habits really look like and what if anything I need to change. So this week I have been focused on the reports and I have increased my protein intake from 17% to almost 30%. Both carbs and proteins have come down a bit and what a difference it has made. I have so much more energy now even with staying under my calories budget. I feel energized to do anything and not feel sluggish throughout the day. It has been a wonderful change and I am embracing it while playing with how to keep my protein intake up and trying new recipes.

Have you tried anything new recently? Was it something you would keep in your lifestyle or do you want to change it? What can you do to improve your life?