Some days the hole I try to climb out of is too hard and I slip and fall back into it. The hole is a black pit where the light is just not visible and I wonder if it is even worth it to try to find that light. Yet, I keep fighting and keep the torch going because I know the light is there, I have seen it and have been so close. It has been within fingers reach and I slipped back into that hole, not as determined to get out as I was the first time. But I am making a conscious effort.
I have been lying to myself for the past 6 months with 'logging' my food even though I know that I have been eating other things from what I have logged and the calorie count has been higher than I have wanted to admit. I love all food and I have a hard time staying away from the things I know are bad for me.
I am finally realizing that I need to take control of my eating habits and find myself again. Climb out of this ugly hole so that I can live life fully without feeling trapped. So here I am opening myself up to the ugly truth but also trying to change things around. I want to make a list of roses (good) and thorns (bad). The hope is to recognize the good things and work on the not so good.
Rose: Tracked everything the past 2 days and ate under budget.
Thorn: Not exercising
Here is to continuing my success of tracking and working on working out more often.
